Peace had been hard to come by in recent days, even in the late hours where she had been able to get into a REM cycle, so finding things to occupy her had proven critical in staying refreshed. Strolling the promenade of Deep Space 11 had brought a surprising respite the evening following the trial, and damn did she need some respite. Ever since she’d learned that she’d been called to give testimony, right up to the moment she finished (and every intervening moment between), Noli Auru had probably felt every emotion conceivable. From the sadness and guilt of betraying her friend to the elation of her part in the process being complete, the last few days had been an emotional whirlwind and had certainly threatened to take their toll. It was only now that she could understand her friend’s (or was it now former friend) need for medication to help her deal with the wealth of emotions she felt.

Sitting on a bench looking out over the stars that blanketed the night sky, was it possible that Noli had come to regret the actions she had taken? Nazir had always been ruled by her emotions, which had been clear since their first days on the ship, and while a tragic turn of events had led them to this, maybe she should have been more understanding of the Trill’s plight. Maybe all of this could have been avoided if she had been a bit more proactive with Doctor Zinn, and prevented him from giving the Captain her medication when she found out about it. Maybe she should have had the Doctor relieve the Captain of duty when it was clear she was making rash decisions, but with that bordering on mutiny, it would have required some sheer fucking hubris to make that kind of call. She should have done something. Hindsight though, as Prida would often remind her, was a wonderful thing.

Startled by a sudden clash of metal on metal disturbing her peace, Noli turned swiftly and watched another proprietor close for the evening. It was then, out of the corner of her eye, that she caught sight of a familiar face approaching from the turbo lift further down the promenade deck. As the figure drew closer and it became clear they were headed specifically towards her, the Bajoran rose to her feet and tugged on the hem of her uniform jacket, pulling out the creases so her uniform looked as presentable as it could, even if she looked worse for wear.

“Commander Noli,” the tall, imposing Efrosian addressed the woman in the deep, commanding tone she had heard throughout the day. Fleet Captain Vos stopped close to the considerably younger woman and gestured for her to resume her seat on the bench, sliding into the open space beside her.

“Good evening sir,” Noli smiled, unnerved by the sudden, unexpected appearance of the Fleet Captain. But as she retook her seat, it dawned on her that perhaps it wasn’t sudden or to be unexpected given this was his station and his command.

“You’ve found one of my favourite spots on the whole station,” Kelvan smiled from behind his incredibly pristine, straightened, ivory hair. “From this window,” he gestured in front of them, “you can see all of the traffic to and from the station, not to mention you get a glorious sunrise in the morning,” he placed his hands on his knees and leant forward taking in the view, the same way he often did.

Opting for silence to appreciate the setting they were in, it was as if the Captain knew exactly what to mention and when. Right on cue, Lakota came into view, its standard orbit position several hundred meters away would be in focus for at least the next few minutes. The ship’s presence seemed to cause some unrest for the ageing Efrosian, who let out a wistful sigh.

“The tribunal is over,” he finally spoke, his eyes never leaving the viewport ahead of them.

That wasn’t what she had expected to hear, and the look on her face probably betrayed that feeling to the Captain. “I’m sorry sir. I thought we were due back in the morning?” she asked.

“I’ve just come from a meeting with Fleet Captain Nazir,” he continued in his comforting drawl. “Starfleet Command offered her a deal, which she has accepted.”

A deal? Well, that was good, right? Everything she had read in the past, where deals had been struck between parties in any kind of negotiation, it generally meant there was some sort of positive result for all involved. Even after everything, she hoped more than anything that the Captain would get a favourable outcome.

“Captain Nazir has accepted an offer to travel to Caelum Station and undergo a period of rehabilitation and psychological evaluation. It looks like it could be a lengthy process, but when she comes out the other side she’ll be able to return to service,” the Efrosian revealed, his shoulders relaxing a little as he turned to glance at the Bajoran.

Tears formed in the corner of her eyes, a wave of relief hitting her as the positive outcome she hoped for was revealed; thankfully, the Captain’s career wasn’t over and after a period of rehab, she’d be back in the centre seat.

That begged an important question, and while she didn’t expect it to be her, it still needed to be asked. “Who’ll be in command until she returns?” she posed the question when composed enough.

“Captain Nazir won’t be returning,” the Efrosian revealed. Noticing the look of confusion on the Bajoran’s face, he felt the need to elaborate further. “As part of her plea, Nazir has relinquished command of the Lakota and accepted a voluntary demotion to Captain. She’ll no longer be in command of the squadron, and she’ll not be returning to the ship.”

Rising to her feet, the Bajoran stumbled to the viewport ahead of them and placed her hands on the window frame to steady herself. Her eyes welled as the realisation of the heavy price the Captain had paid hit her.

“This is all my fault,” Noli whispered, her head lowered and shaking from side to side. “I should have done more to help her. I could have acted quicker to prevent things from escalating, could have reported things sooner…”

“Yes you could have,” Vos answered bluntly, “but you put your trust in your commanding officer, as any good executive officer should. She let you down. She let you both down. And she let Starfleet down. She knew a price had to be paid, and she paid it.” He rose to his feet now and joined the Bajoran at the viewer.

“Several years ago, I attended a symposium chaired by the legendary Admiral Jean-Luc Picard,” he let out a smile as memories of the past flooded back to him. “He said something that day which has always stuck with me, even on that bench today. He said that ‘The first duty of every Starfleet officer is to the truth, whether it’s scientific truth or historical truth or personal truth. It is the guiding principle on which Starfleet is based,” he turned to the younger Bajoran, who was clearly struggling with her own emotions right now and placed a hand on her shoulder. “And if you can’t find it within yourself to stand up and tell the truth about what happened, you don’t deserve to wear that uniform.”

Turning back to the window, the Efrosian watched as Lakota moved out of sight. “What you did today was hard, and came at great detriment to yourself. I’ve already heard whisperings of discontent among your crew, I saw the way some shunned you in the courtroom. You’ve lost their confidence, and you’ve lost your Captain. But you did your duty today… no matter the cost to yourself.”

“Perhaps the cost was too high on this occasion?” Noli shook her head and returned to the seat behind them. How could she possibly reconcile with the fact that performing her duty had cost the crew she cared so much about so dearly?

“Captain Nazir didn’t think so,” Vos said, spinning on his heels with his hands on his hips, staring down at the confused Bajoran. “There’s something for you in her quarters,” he smiled, then placed his hand on her shoulder, a reassuring squeeze before departing.

Watching as Vos departed, the Bajoran couldn’t help but wonder what could be waiting for her in the Captain’s quarters. Of course, there was only one way to find out.

A piercing light shone through the darkness as the doors to Captain Nazir’s quarters on deck two, section thirteen gamma fizzed open and granted entrance to the Bajoran XO. Ordinarily, she’d never be granted access, but as the most senior officer on the ship in the Captain’s absence, it was apparent that nowhere was off limits.

“Computer,” Noli called out, taking a step into Keziah’s private abode, “lights.” 

A single beep later and a bright luminescence illuminated the Captain’s chambers, or what was left of them anyway. Gone were the delightfully stitched throw rugs Nazir had received as a gift from Or’uil’s people upon liberating their homeworld. All the trinkets and ornaments that had beautifully adorned every surface had vanished, leaving nothing, not even the slightest of dust patches to mark their former territory. In fairness, the place was almost immaculate. Gone were the data PADDs that were strewn all over her coffee table. Cushions were strategically placed on the sofa and chairs, no longer scattered randomly. Chairs around the nearby dining table were tucked in. The room looked as if it was ready for its next occupant. And as a single tear stained her cheek, the Commander realised that she wasn’t ready for this. She had no choice, but she wasn’t ready for Nazir to be gone.

Unsure of what she was looking for, the Bajoran stood in the middle of the living space and looked around in a state of confusion. There was nothing she could see waiting for her, nothing the Captain had supposedly left behind.

Wait. Nothing but a single red light flickering on the wall-mounted display, next to a simple instruction. ‘Play Recording’.

Perching on the edge of the sofa, the Commander braced herself for whatever message the recording would play. Her hands supported her, grasping the sofa on either side as she took a deep breath. When she was ready, the woman looked up, as if she was searching the heavens for answers.

“Computer, play recording.”

As soon as the recording began, Noli was in a battle to control her emotions.

To my dear friend Auru,

Even after everything she’d done to her, Keziah still felt able to use her given name, something only two others had ever felt comfortable or safe enough to do. She still cared about her, after everything.

If you’re listening to this message then my time on the Lakota has come to an end and there will be no further proceedings; the tribunal is over, and so with it the torment we have both felt.

After some difficult conversations with Starfleet Command, I decided to voluntarily step down and accept a demotion. I know this news will come as a shock, but please understand that I did this for myself, for Starfleet, and for you, my friend. The truth is, I couldn’t allow the trial to continue dragging us all through the mud. It wouldn’t have been fair on any of us—least of all the crew. And after seeing you on the stand today, I couldn’t bear the thought of putting you through more of that torture.

Tears were in free fall as the Bajoran wiped them using the sleeve of her uniform jacket, listening to her friend’s heartfelt words, and the sorrow in her voice.

You have always stood by me, Auru, even when I know it wasn’t easy. I want you to know that I hold no ill will towards you my friend, not for a single moment. I know what I put you through—what I put all of you through—and still, you remained the steadfast leader this ship needed. I’m proud of everything we accomplished together; from the earliest days on the Lakota, through every battle and every hard-won victory, you were there. You weren’t just my executive officer—you became my confidant, my closest friend, and for that, I will forever be grateful.

As the tears turned to gentle sobbing, the doors to the Captain’s quarters parted and a figure wandered inside, looking, searching for something. When she spotted Noli sobbing on the sofa, Prida rushed over and threw her arms around her kin, holding her and soothing her, as they listened to the Captain’s message together.

Somewhere along the line, I forgot that, and things went wrong. I wish I could undo the harm I caused, but I can’t. No amount of apologies could ever forgive what I’ve done to you all. You deserved better from me. Starfleet deserved better. The crew… they deserved better. But I hope, despite it all, that you can look back at our time together with pride because I know I do. We faced some of the hardest moments any Starfleet officer could face, and you stood tall through it all. You were the rock that held this crew together when I could no longer be that for them.

I wish I could tell you all of this in person, but I won’t be there when you get this letter. I’ve been placed on indefinite medical leave, and I’ll be starting my rehabilitation at Caelum Station soon. It’s for the best, I think. There’s a lot I need to come to terms with—things I’ve been avoiding for too long. But that’s not the only reason I’m writing to you. There’s something important you should know.

Auru, you are going to be a Captain.

Leaning away from her friend, the two looked each other in the face in utter surprise. Noli unsure if what she had heard was correct, Prida ecstatic for her best friend.

I petitioned Starfleet to grant you the rank of Captain, and I am proud to say that they’ve agreed. You’ve earned it a hundred times over, and it’s about time they recognized that you are more than ready to take on this role, and to lead your own crew. You have always valued your duty—both to Starfleet and to the people you serve—above all else. That’s what makes you such an incredible leader, and why I know you’ll be an incredible captain. But there is one more thing you need to know: Starfleet believes that, given everything that has happened, it is best for all involved if you, too, make a fresh start.

The joy on Noli’s face evaporated almost as instantly as it had appeared, as Nazir spoke words such as ‘fresh start’. What did she mean?

I know that might be hard to hear, but I think they’re right. The Lakota was our home, but it carries too much of our past now. It’s time for you to step into your own future, to lead without the weight of what happened hanging over you. You deserve a ship and a crew that’s entirely yours, free from the ghosts of the past. I’m sorry I won’t be there to see you step into that new role, but I’ll be rooting for you from afar, always.

Congratulations, Captain Noli. I know you’ll be amazing.

Even after the news that she’d be moving on, it was hard for her to disagree with their sentiments, just as it was hard to feel anything but happiness at finally achieving her lifetime’s ambition. Prida draped an arm over her friend’s shoulders and pulled her close as the message continued and they were left alone to absorb the Captain’s final heartfelt words.

Whatever comes next, know that I am so proud of you, of everything we’ve done together, and of the Captain you’ve become. May your journey ahead be filled with triumphs, new adventures, and the knowledge that you are always supported by those who believe in you—myself included.

Thank you for being my friend, for standing by me through it all. I wish you every success and happiness in the future.

With all my heart,

Keziah