“You wanted to see me, sir?”
Captain Leopold Halsey glanced up from his ready room desk on the USS Olympic, gesturing to the chair opposite him. Lieutenant Commander Jordan Reid had answered his meeting request. She sat, a curious look on her face. “I did, Jordan. Something interesting has crossed my desk, and I thought of you.”
Jordan frowned as she leaned in, wondering what was about to be offered. She had been serving as the XO on the Olympic for under a year, and she’d learned plenty about managing officers and working with the crew across different departments. “That sounds ominous, sir.”
“You remember the USS Southampton and its brief foray into the squadron?” She replied with a nod. It had been Abigail Scott’s first command that had come to an ignominious end with her shifting to the Justice as one of two executive officers. “They’ve refitted her to a Chapel variant.”
The air between them tightened, and Reid grappled with a subtle panic rippling through her stomach. “Well, that’s a good call. Those ships are useful.” She cocked to her head to the side, not wanting to dance around whatever this was. “Why are you telling me this?”
Halsey leaned over his desk. “Fourth Fleet has offered the ship to our squadron. Seems Fontana’s been looking to expand our medical services in the rimward.” He handed over a PADD. “I asked to meet with you so I can extend to you an offer for command.”
Reid grasped the PADD, feeling her eyes fly wide and her mouth drop open. “Sir?” Nothing else came out. She stared at Halsey, unable to comprehend what he was saying.
“You’ve come a long way since the USS Erigone, Jordan.” She felt his eyes pushing in on her, watching. She didn’t flinch at the name and she held her face tight. Ambrose Harris had been her CO on the Raven-class starship, and a relationship between them soon followed. His death, while not the open wound it had been, remained tender. He continued, “Commodore Fontana recommended you as his first choice. I’m seconding his recommendation.” Halsey nodded at the PADD. “I’ve got two gifts for you.”
Jordan scrolled through the data, coming to a dead stop at the two names he’d given her. “You can’t be serious, Leo.” She shook her head. “That’s two officers you’re giving up. I can’t accept this.” The names stared back at her.
It was Halsey’s turn to shake his head. “You need seasoned officers. They fit the positions. You need an XO. You need a flight controller who has done operations. The rest you’ll have the pick of the pack, but these two will make the center chair just that much better.” She frowned, and he added, “It’s not that I think you can’t do it, Jordan. It’s that I don’t want you to do it alone. Commander Scott’s reassignment was not of her doing or design. You are taking on a ship with an accidental history. Having Sadie and William at your side will keep this story your own, and not about what came before.”
Reid felt her heart beating in her ears and wondered if she was supposed to feel differently about this moment. “I suppose turning it down would be a bad thing.”
Halsey chuckled darkly. “There’s bad and there’s bad. This would be bad.” He sat back in his chair. “You haven’t said anything about Rowan recently.”
She blew a raspberry. “We have a third date tomorrow. This’ll change things.” She wasn’t sure how to feel about Commander Rowan Hale. He was older. Ambrose had been older. Reid lowered her voice, “I looked him up. He lost someone too.” She winced as she said it.
Halsey stared at her for a moment before replying. She could feel his eyes trying to see beyond the surface. “That’s a first for you, Jordan. You don’t snoop.”
She sighed. “I know. I just…I felt something was off on our second date. Not enough to ask, but enough to notice. So I went looking.” She met his stare, and could feel her cheeks burning. “I know. Not my proudest moment.” Jordan forced her eyes away from his and up to the ceiling. She waited for Halsey to judge her, or condemn her. He did none of those.
He asked, “Do you like him?”
She kept staring at the tiles above, blinking away unexpected emotions. “Yeah. I do.” She lowered her head, meeting his gaze again, tears glittering at the edges of her eyes. “I feel…safe with him. That hug. It did things to me, Leo. Things I haven’t felt since Ambrose. I didn’t want it to end.” She accepted the box of tissues, dabbing away at the tears that trickled down her face. “You have the talent of making me cry, Leo. I don’t like it.” Silence fell between them, and she felt his eyes standing sentinel over her as she worked through the bubbling emotions.
Leo’s voice was soft and warm. “That’s that thing we can’t ever really give a name. It’s something that moves us. Shakes our soul. We only get a few of those in our lifetimes, Jordan. You don’t want to admit it, but there’s something to this guy.”
Reid grumbled. “I don’t like it when you’re right like this.” She took a deep breath and exhaled a long, drawn-out sigh. “You’re right. There’s something about him. I want that third date. And a couple more. It just…it feels wrong, but I know it’s not.”
Halsey stood and walked around his desk and sat down in the chair next to her. “Ghosts, Jordan. They hang around with us, even after they’re gone. Ambrose Harris was a great man and an incredible officer. He’ll always be there in the back of your mind. Same for Hale. And that’s ok. First love leaves a mark that you can’t scrub off.”
“I appreciate the medical symbolism, Leo.” She pushed a sly smile across her lips, feeling the warmth of it pushing back the tears. “I guess I need to come clean with him at dinner tomorrow.”
Halsey patted her arm. “I’m sure he’s looked you up, Jordan. Rowan Hale is a lot of things, but unprepared isn’t one of them.”
Jordan sighed quietly. “I suppose I need to tell him what I know.” She felt embarrassed, as if she’d stepped in something. Halsey seemed to see it in her face.
“None of us is perfect, Jordan. You were worried about protecting your heart. I think he’ll understand.”
She tightened her face, resolute, and yet still unsure. “I hope he does. Thanks, Leo.”
He stood and returned to his side of the desk. “He might be the right one for you, Jordan. Don’t ignore that feeling.”
She stood at attention, and left. As she stepped back onto the bridge, probably for the last time, she reminded herself that she deserved the good things in life. A voice in her head echoed it.
Ambrose would want it for you, too.
