((April, Ready Room))

Wong was filing his last report about the events surrounding the recovery of the Trenton just moments before the ship was due to dock at Starbase 308. After a small amount of soul searching he had decided to not include the full findings of Doc Lady’s thorough investigation, and autopsy info in his official mission report. Regardless of how long ago the events had occurred, he saw no sense in tarnishing anyone’s legacy. Who would ever want to hear that their ancestors had resorted to cannabalism and suicide in their final days?

“Captains Log, supplemental. The April is arriving at Starbase 308, and will layover for few days as we prepare to embark on the return leg of our border patrol. I will be sending Commander Aruin and Lt. Jenkins with the remains of the Trenton crew who requested to be returned to their next of kin or homeworld aboard the Irrawaddy. They will catch up to us in about a week. I have put Dr. Lt. Pretty Lady in for a Distinguished Conduct Medal for her tireless efforts, resourcefulness and going above and beyond the call of duty. I’ve also had the XO remind the crew that they may review, and if necessary update their own procedural service questionnaires and last will and testaments in light of our recent experience. The analysis of the debris Trenton shuttlepod is currently in progress, but all signs point to a rapid, explosive, unscheduled disassembly event… I couldn’t be prouder of how the crew conducted themselves given the circumstances. Computer end log.”

((April, 4 Forward Lounge))

A few days later, just before they were about to undock from the station  Lt. Boffo, the 2IC of the ships Tactical Department and Head of Security found himself staring at an oddly dressed stranger. He had just gotten off duty and stopped in for a drink when he spotted the old man sitting alone in a corner booth, just gazing out the large bay windows.

The XO arrived at the bar and noticed the look of scrutiny on Boffo’s face and followed his stare over to the Tuxedo clad, white gloved man. “Who in the fuck?”

He swiftly hovered over to the guy in the corner booth.

“Excuse me, but uh, what are you doing here?” the XO asked.

“Ah, you must be the famed first officer. As I recall I met your grandmother about a half century ago. How she doing?” The odd interloper replied.

“You leave my mammy out of this. I asked what you’re doing here.” The Beluga fumed.

“Well my boy, I’m here to help us do our part to fix the universe, time, and reality itself.” The man said in his thick and cheerful Cockney accent.

“Yeah sure bub. Alright you better show me some authorization or orders or I’m gonna call security.” The Beluga said, sensing that he was probably dealing with a local conman or old dude that was losing his faculties and running away from a loveless marriage or some such.

“Of course my good fellow. Here you are.” The man handed over a padd from a vest pocket with a smile and a twinkle in his eye.

Mee Ih skimmed the padd and mumbled along as he read, “Butler Gallifray, Master Smith, CC, Pro-Praetor Of Rome, Order of St George, OBE, VC, Croix De Guerre, MSci, Baron of Tyme-upon-Colster, KMV, what da….Senior Field Investigator, yada yada, Temporal Investigations Division?…Sigma Zulu 4 security clearance…date of Birth 3102 BC? Come on, is this your first time, this isn’t even believable…”

Back at the bar, Boffo tapped his comm badge, “Lt. Boffo to the bridge. Were we expecting any new crew or passengers to be reporting aboard before we set off?”

Up on the bridge Lt. Singh was about to reply that they weren’t when a Priority 1 communique from Starfleet Command popped up on his console. The message simply stated that an emergent situation had just developed, and that they would be receiving a new set of orders and that a mission specialist had been dispatched to them and would be arriving soon. It also stated that the specialist would provide a more detailed briefing in person.

“This is the bridge, we’ve just received word that yes, we are expecting a mission specialist to report aboard. Apparently he will be bringing orders with him.” Singh replied over the comm.

Back in the lounge Mee Ih had just called Lt. Boffo over, intent on having the crazy trespasser arrested and removed from the ship.

“I assure you my good man, that paperwork is all legitimate Commander.” Butler reported.

“Oh yeah? We’ll see about that, you son of bitch. Boffo, take him to the brig until we can get this all sorted.” Mee Ih squeeked as he hovered over until he was uncomfortably close and looked the old man right in the face.

“Oi, me mum was a bit rambunctious admittedly, what with whole apple eating incident and then her little trist with me dad during his incarceration, but there’s no need for name calling.”

“Oh, so your dads a criminal too eh? Not getting off to a good start here pal.” Mee Ih gurgled in the Beluga equivalent of a growl.

“Yeah pops was a bit of a Robin Hood type figure, but his crimes are not really in doubt or worth debating really. If you ask me, they did me dad dirty, what with the whole being ‘chained to a mountain’ and having his liver pecked out each bloody night for a couple eons bit.” Butler replied.

Lt. Boffa cleared his throat, “Uh, Commander.”

The XO backed away from the ‘con man’ and hovered over to the Lt a few metres away.

“Apparently, we are expecting a mission specialist to be joining us today. He might be telling the truth…are those his orders there?” Boffa asked in a hushed tone as he looked at the padd on the table in front of Mr. Gallifray.

“Yeah, so he says, looks like a bunch of bullshit to me though.” The cetacean snorted through his blowhole still not believing the man’s story.

Boffo walked over and picked the padd up and accessed it, as he noticed the Mr. Gallifray had gone back to staring absently out the window.

“Did you scroll to the bottom sir? That’s the proper code of the day, and that is our vessels clearance key.” Boffo scrolled to it and then held the padd up in front of the Mee Ih.

Captain Wong hurriedly entered the lounge behind Mee Ih as the XO exhaled abruptly causing a slight whistle from his blowhole, “Hmmm. Well then….welcome aboard I guess. Sorry for giving you a bit of a hassle. That bio of yours seems a bit far fetched, you gotta admit.”

Just out of shear curiosity, Lt. Boffo scrolled back up to the newcomers bio on the padd, and checked out one section specifically;

Name: Philleastrionides Leonidas Titaniakos, legally changed to Butler Remple Gallifray in 1705 AD.

Parents: Mother= Evelyn(Lanthanite) dob- prior to 10800 BC, deceased 2065 AD

Father=Prometheus(Titan/Olympian-Polluxian) dob- estimated around 16000 BC, whereabouts unknown.

“Whats going on over here Number One?” The Captain asked.

“Oh nothing sir, just welcoming our new mission specialist aboard Cap.”

“Mee Ih?” Wong prodded, having heard his excitable XO just apologize for giving the guy a hard time.

The cetacean sighed, “After I accused him of being a conman, and insulated his mother, and threatened to arrest him…sorry sir.”

Wong frowned and shook his head and then approached the striking dressed new arrival, “Welcome aboard, I’m Captain Danny Wong, I apologize for my first officer, uh, he means well.” He offered Butler his hand.

Gallifray stood and shook the Captain’s hand, “Quite alright, no apologies necessary.” He leaned over and whispered to Danny, “I like him, he’s got a lotta spunk, and we’ll need a lot of that if we’re going to fix this mess.”

“So, what are we going to be fixing? We were told you would be giving us more details about this new mission of ours.” Wong asked as Butler Gallifray clasped his white gloved hands behind his back and started slowly walking towards the lounge’s entrance.

“Like I just told your XO a few minutes ago. We’re going to fix time, the universe, and save our reality as we know it.” Butler then turned back and gave the three of them a big wide grin. For the remainder of the rest of their lives, Wong, Boffo and Mee IH would claim that, in that moment, one of the man’s teeth actually twinkled visibly.